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The “Must Have” Personality Traits To Be a Successful Expat
“She isn’t going to make it.”
“Yep” I said agreeing with Tracye.
This is how our discussion ended when I was telling my wife about an email that I got the other day from a person.
See, once you have spent some time living as an expat, you know those little idiosyncrasies that it takes to be an expat. When someone does not have those little expat quirks, you can just tell. They are not going to make it past their first year.
The person that emailed me was being a bit critical and for some reason it just rubbed me the wrong way.
The reason is that I have seen this person posting to some of the expat forums out there and they were being pretty critical and unnecessarily opinionated there as well.
IMPORTANT TIP – Overly critical and unnecessarily opinionated are two things that don’t go over well in the expat community.
I told the person, “people who are critical do not make good expats for a several reasons.”
1 – Nothing is ever good enough.
2 – They bring their US expectations to the country they are expatting to.
3 – Because they are critical, they are pretty quickly alienated from the expat community.
All of these things will send you home within a year. I have seen it happen over and over again.
What people fail to realize is that expats leave the states for a reason. They are usually leaving all that drama and stress behind and get pretty offended when people lug that sort of baggage down with them.
It takes a special person to be a successful expat.
Here are some traits that you need to have or need to develop if you are going to make it as an expat.
1) You See Challenges as Opportunities
If you see a challenge as a chance to learn or grow and you see challenges as an opportunity then you have the right attitude to be a successful expat. Look at what you are facing. You are going to be the stranger in the strange lands. You will have to learn EVERYTHING over and in a different language too. Where to get the best pizza? Where do you pay your bills? How do you get the utilities turned on? Where can I go grocery shopping, and the list goes on. All these are challenges.
How Tracye and I handle it by looking at everything as a new adventure. Have we been to that restaurant? No, well let’s give it a try. What about that mom and pop grocery store? Nope, let’s go check it out.
If you hate facing these sort of things, rethink your idea. BUT if this excites you, you are expat material.
2) it’s a Small World After All
“It’s no biggie, we are only a 4 hour plane ride from seeing the grand kids.”
That is how we see it living here in Panama.
Do you know how many people we have met who are expats from Texas? We were amazed. They even know where New Braunfels is, which is the small town we are from. There truly is six degrees of separation and it is amazing how many people we have met down here that know the same people up in the states.
Now on the other hand if distance daunts you or you are one pining to “get back home” then you will probably not like living in another country.
Funny, we were having dinner with a couple that come down regularly because they bought some expensive home (they did not listen to us – rent first for at least a year then buy) and I kept talking about how glad we were to be back home here in Costa Rica (that is when we lived there). She commented, “This is home? Really?”
Both of us kind of looked at her and I said, “well yes, isn’t it your home? “
“ Oh no.. I miss my tub and TV in English and the food…” she continued to rattle off things she misses.
I said “ __________ then what are you doing down here then and why did you buy that home? “
DING, DING, DING … Nope, not going to make it. And in fact they are now trying to sell that home and will probably take a HUGE loss for it to because they are so frustrated.
IF home is where you lay your head, you will make a good expat.
3) You Can Think Outside the Box
As an expat you need to be flexible, adaptable and good at problem solving with the ability to work around obstacles. In your new life abroad you will face all sorts of challenges in your everyday world. You will even be challenged in terms of your beliefs and perhaps even your morals!
Got a problem with “payola” to get things done? Well, you may have to rethink that certain position because sometimes that is the ONLY way that you will get things done.
Think you can run down to the local Home Depot and get a certain part to fix your sprinkler system? Think again and then think how you are going to fix the problem with what you have on hand.
Where there is a will, there is a way. It is one of the reasons why God invented Duct Tape.
If duct tape is your good friend, you might make it as an expat.
4) You Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
If everything doesn’t go according to (your) plan or why “They” (meaning locals) can’t do it the good old American way, you may struggle as an expat. Just get it in your mind that you will come up against annoying situations, traffic jams at inopportune moments, the electric going off, the water being shut off, I can name a 101 different things. If you are able to let all that stuff roll off your back and make the best of it, you may make a good expat.
But if you are critical and overly opinionated of things because they do not measure up to YOUR expectations, pack it in right now, you’re not going to make a good expat.
5) You Feel Free
Do you feel burdened by an ever intrusive government? Banks & mortgage companies just tork you off and you HATE that stinking robot who answers all their phones? If you hate having to go to work for “the man” then you may have what it takes to be an expat.
These are things that just seem to melt away once you step off that plane in your new home. That is a real feeling that many of us have when we first get here. “ I’M FREE!”
It feels like the stress of the US and all its trappings just melt away. If this is appealing to you, then you may make a good expat.
BUT… If these things are what define you, you may want to stay put and not try the expat life.
6) The Ability To Adapt and Overcome
If you’re able to adapt to fit in, or you’re happy and willing to learn new ways, then you are on the path to being a good expat. If getting out of your comfort zone does not scare the tar out of you, then maybe you are ready to make that expat jump.
You really need to go with the flow when you live an expat life. Sure things are not all unicorns and rainbows, but it is how you handle those situations that make you or break you as an expat.
The number one thing that you have to remember, this is not the states, so NEVER assume… EVER.
Just because it is the way you have always done it, it may not be the same way in your new home. What you do is “cowboy up and drive on”
If you are rigid, your new home will see to it that it breaks you, and it will break you hard. It happens every time. IF you are able to adapt, you will be able to stay, if you don’t, you will be packing it up within a year.
7) You Desire Change
That is what my wife Tracy and I wanted. Here is several of our reasons…
1 – Our kids are grown and out of the house. We have been living in the Texas Hill Country for over 12 years now and we wanted a change. We both work from home over the internet and so long as where we live has stable fast internet service, we can live and still earn income.
We called this “Starting Life 2.0″
2 – Over the years we have been seeing things take place here in the United States that we do not like. More and more we see our nation moving in a very radical left socialist even possibly communist direction. We see the more and more middle class being eliminated due to a lack of quality earning jobs, rise in taxes, rise in inflation, rise in food and the list goes on.
3 – We saw that if we continued to live where we were, soon it would be difficult paying to live in our own country. Food prices are ever rising, taxes growing and oh yea, Obama Care. A huge chunk of our own income was being stripped from us before we could even spend it. So we “escaped” while we were still able and had the resources to get out.
What is upsetting is that this trend is not going away and in fact with the re-election of President Obama it looks like this trend is going to continue and possibly grow worse. There are even concerns that he may try to run for a third term.
We wanted change.
Now, if you are someone who does not like change and the thought of packing up your stuff gives you panic attacks, then maybe expat life is not for you.
Living overseas is fabulous and it has SO many benefits. Tracye and I are living the life that many people just dream of. In fact we have had a number of comments from friends on our Facebook telling us that they are living vicariously through us. We tell folks all the time that they can always come down for a visit and we would love to share our little piece of paradise with them.
Few people take us up on it, but those who do often times catch that expat bug.
Living an expat life can and will change you, challenge you, and even give you a whole new perspective on life.
It is interesting that you no longer live in what I call “The Matrix.” Down here I feel like I am looking at the US from the outside in. Because of that, one tends to make sense out of a lot of things. This is all because you are living an expat life.
IMPORTANT – Burn The Ships
If you really desire it, then don’t hold back and know that we are here to help. But I guess the one big trait that you have GOT to have to be that successful expat, you have got to be willing to burn the ships the moment you arrive.
So many people have that “one foot in and one foot out” sort of mentality. Maybe they do not move all their stuff down or the keep their home back in the states, or a dozen other “escape doors” they create for themselves.
Thing is, that if you create those “escape doors” you will use them and probably use them in the first year of your expat life.
Know that it is normal to worry and wonder. But if you have made all the right decisions and put as many things in place to help you transition to an expat life, then you will probably do fine.
As an expat you will experience and see more of the world. You will experience things that your friends back home can only dream of. They all call you crazy, but secretly they wish they had the courage to do what you are doing. You will find yourself rising to challenges to the point that it becomes second nature and totally natural. And no matter what life throws at you, you would have learned to embrace it all. And when the day comes to an end, you sit back, kick your feet up and say “pura vida” (to the pure life) and watch the beautiful sunset together.
That is what my wife and I make a point to do every evening. Watch the sunset together and see the stars come out at night.
That is what it takes to be an expat.
Do you have it in you?
“She isn’t going to make it.”
“Yep” I said agreeing with Tracye.
This is how our discussion ended when I was telling my wife about an email that I got the other day from a person.
See, once you have spent some time living as an expat, you know those little idiosyncrasies that it takes to be an expat. When someone does not have those little expat quirks, you can just tell. They are not going to make it past their first year.
The person that emailed me was being a bit critical and for some reason it just rubbed me the wrong way.
The reason is that I have seen this person posting to some of the expat forums out there and they were being pretty critical and unnecessarily opinionated there as well.
IMPORTANT TIP – Overly critical and unnecessarily opinionated are two things that don’t go over well in the expat community.
I told the person, “people who are critical do not make good expats for a several reasons.”
1 – Nothing is ever good enough.
2 – They bring their US expectations to the country they are expatting to.
3 – Because they are critical, they are pretty quickly alienated from the expat community.
All of these things will send you home within a year. I have seen it happen over and over again.
What people fail to realize is that expats leave the states for a reason. They are usually leaving all that drama and stress behind and get pretty offended when people lug that sort of baggage down with them.
It takes a special person to be a successful expat.
Here are some traits that you need to have or need to develop if you are going to make it as an expat.
1) You See Challenges as Opportunities
If you see a challenge as a chance to learn or grow and you see challenges as an opportunity then you have the right attitude to be a successful expat. Look at what you are facing. You are going to be the stranger in the strange lands. You will have to learn EVERYTHING over and in a different language too. Where to get the best pizza? Where do you pay your bills? How do you get the utilities turned on? Where can I go grocery shopping, and the list goes on. All these are challenges.
How Tracye and I handle it by looking at everything as a new adventure. Have we been to that restaurant? No, well let’s give it a try. What about that mom and pop grocery store? Nope, let’s go check it out.
If you hate facing these sort of things, rethink your idea. BUT if this excites you, you are expat material.
2) it’s a Small World After All
“It’s no biggie, we are only a 4 hour plane ride from seeing the grand kids.”
That is how we see it living here in Panama.
Do you know how many people we have met who are expats from Texas? We were amazed. They even know where New Braunfels is, which is the small town we are from. There truly is six degrees of separation and it is amazing how many people we have met down here that know the same people up in the states.
Now on the other hand if distance daunts you or you are one pining to “get back home” then you will probably not like living in another country.
Funny, we were having dinner with a couple that come down regularly because they bought some expensive home (they did not listen to us – rent first for at least a year then buy) and I kept talking about how glad we were to be back home here in Costa Rica (that is when we lived there). She commented, “This is home? Really?”
Both of us kind of looked at her and I said, “well yes, isn’t it your home? “
“ Oh no.. I miss my tub and TV in English and the food…” she continued to rattle off things she misses.
I said “ __________ then what are you doing down here then and why did you buy that home? “
DING, DING, DING … Nope, not going to make it. And in fact they are now trying to sell that home and will probably take a HUGE loss for it to because they are so frustrated.
IF home is where you lay your head, you will make a good expat.
3) You Can Think Outside the Box
As an expat you need to be flexible, adaptable and good at problem solving with the ability to work around obstacles. In your new life abroad you will face all sorts of challenges in your everyday world. You will even be challenged in terms of your beliefs and perhaps even your morals!
Got a problem with “payola” to get things done? Well, you may have to rethink that certain position because sometimes that is the ONLY way that you will get things done.
Think you can run down to the local Home Depot and get a certain part to fix your sprinkler system? Think again and then think how you are going to fix the problem with what you have on hand.
Where there is a will, there is a way. It is one of the reasons why God invented Duct Tape.
If duct tape is your good friend, you might make it as an expat.
4) You Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
If everything doesn’t go according to (your) plan or why “They” (meaning locals) can’t do it the good old American way, you may struggle as an expat. Just get it in your mind that you will come up against annoying situations, traffic jams at inopportune moments, the electric going off, the water being shut off, I can name a 101 different things. If you are able to let all that stuff roll off your back and make the best of it, you may make a good expat.
But if you are critical and overly opinionated of things because they do not measure up to YOUR expectations, pack it in right now, you’re not going to make a good expat.
5) You Feel Free
Do you feel burdened by an ever intrusive government? Banks & mortgage companies just tork you off and you HATE that stinking robot who answers all their phones? If you hate having to go to work for “the man” then you may have what it takes to be an expat.
These are things that just seem to melt away once you step off that plane in your new home. That is a real feeling that many of us have when we first get here. “ I’M FREE!”
It feels like the stress of the US and all its trappings just melt away. If this is appealing to you, then you may make a good expat.
BUT… If these things are what define you, you may want to stay put and not try the expat life.
6) The Ability To Adapt and Overcome
If you’re able to adapt to fit in, or you’re happy and willing to learn new ways, then you are on the path to being a good expat. If getting out of your comfort zone does not scare the tar out of you, then maybe you are ready to make that expat jump.
You really need to go with the flow when you live an expat life. Sure things are not all unicorns and rainbows, but it is how you handle those situations that make you or break you as an expat.
The number one thing that you have to remember, this is not the states, so NEVER assume… EVER.
Just because it is the way you have always done it, it may not be the same way in your new home. What you do is “cowboy up and drive on”
If you are rigid, your new home will see to it that it breaks you, and it will break you hard. It happens every time. IF you are able to adapt, you will be able to stay, if you don’t, you will be packing it up within a year.
7) You Desire Change
That is what my wife Tracy and I wanted. Here is several of our reasons…
1 – Our kids are grown and out of the house. We have been living in the Texas Hill Country for over 12 years now and we wanted a change. We both work from home over the internet and so long as where we live has stable fast internet service, we can live and still earn income.
We called this “Starting Life 2.0″
2 – Over the years we have been seeing things take place here in the United States that we do not like. More and more we see our nation moving in a very radical left socialist even possibly communist direction. We see the more and more middle class being eliminated due to a lack of quality earning jobs, rise in taxes, rise in inflation, rise in food and the list goes on.
3 – We saw that if we continued to live where we were, soon it would be difficult paying to live in our own country. Food prices are ever rising, taxes growing and oh yea, Obama Care. A huge chunk of our own income was being stripped from us before we could even spend it. So we “escaped” while we were still able and had the resources to get out.
What is upsetting is that this trend is not going away and in fact with the re-election of President Obama it looks like this trend is going to continue and possibly grow worse. There are even concerns that he may try to run for a third term.
We wanted change.
Now, if you are someone who does not like change and the thought of packing up your stuff gives you panic attacks, then maybe expat life is not for you.
Living overseas is fabulous and it has SO many benefits. Tracye and I are living the life that many people just dream of. In fact we have had a number of comments from friends on our Facebook telling us that they are living vicariously through us. We tell folks all the time that they can always come down for a visit and we would love to share our little piece of paradise with them.
Few people take us up on it, but those who do often times catch that expat bug.
Living an expat life can and will change you, challenge you, and even give you a whole new perspective on life.
It is interesting that you no longer live in what I call “The Matrix.” Down here I feel like I am looking at the US from the outside in. Because of that, one tends to make sense out of a lot of things. This is all because you are living an expat life.
IMPORTANT – Burn The Ships
If you really desire it, then don’t hold back and know that we are here to help. But I guess the one big trait that you have GOT to have to be that successful expat, you have got to be willing to burn the ships the moment you arrive.
So many people have that “one foot in and one foot out” sort of mentality. Maybe they do not move all their stuff down or the keep their home back in the states, or a dozen other “escape doors” they create for themselves.
Thing is, that if you create those “escape doors” you will use them and probably use them in the first year of your expat life.
Know that it is normal to worry and wonder. But if you have made all the right decisions and put as many things in place to help you transition to an expat life, then you will probably do fine.
As an expat you will experience and see more of the world. You will experience things that your friends back home can only dream of. They all call you crazy, but secretly they wish they had the courage to do what you are doing. You will find yourself rising to challenges to the point that it becomes second nature and totally natural. And no matter what life throws at you, you would have learned to embrace it all. And when the day comes to an end, you sit back, kick your feet up and say “pura vida” (to the pure life) and watch the beautiful sunset together.
That is what my wife and I make a point to do every evening. Watch the sunset together and see the stars come out at night.
That is what it takes to be an expat.
Do you have it in you?
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